


Compendium

by LostHydrangea



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, F/M, Reader-Insert, Slow Burn, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-05-13
Updated: 2017-05-24
Packaged: 2018-10-31 10:37:15
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10897599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LostHydrangea/pseuds/LostHydrangea
Summary: Life isn't simple as one of the most well-respected Information Dealers within the walls. Unfortunately, things become even less simple when an important job leads you to joining the Survey Corps. Things don't go quite according to plan, however, when you find that you aren't very good with 3-Dimensional Maneuver Gear and get placed under the training of none other than Captain Levi, humanity's strongest soldier.Levi/ReaderLanguage warning, because, for all his cleanliness, Levi has a dirty mouth.Story runs side-by-side with the plot before, during, and after the events thus far in the anime. Will contain anime spoilers; may eventually contain manga spoilers, but not for a while.Cross-posted on AO3, DeviantArt, and Lunaescence.





	1. Welcome to the Survey Corps

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi there! So I got this plot bunny and couldn't get it out of my head. Incidentally, I have pages and pages of outlining, backstory, and planning, all the way from the day Reader-chan was born until the current plot of the anime. It's also, uh, a lot more complex than the summary lets on. But I can't really reveal much else without spoiling the whole first arc of the story, you feel me? It's gonna move pretty slowly and be more light-hearted for a little while, but uh, once we hit a certain point, stuff will deepen quite a few levels.
> 
> Chapter One: Welcome to the Survey Corps
> 
> Disclaimer: I do not own, nor do I make profit off of, Attack on Titan or any of the characters or ideas affiliated with it. I do own this plot, so please refrain from stealing it. I don't own you either; that's Levi's job. ;)

“There’s no fucking way you’re really this incompetent.”

You glare at the short man in front of you as your feet dangle uselessly in the air for a moment before your body slowly tilts forward – for the eleventh time that day – and you faceplant in the dirt. You let out a groan and don’t even try to get up this time, thinking more about what got you into this situation to begin with.

It was only a little over a week ago when you arrived in Survey Corps Commander Erwin Smith’s office with a recommendation letter asking that you be granted a place in the Corps immediately - without going through the official training process.

“Erwin,” you greeted, closing the door behind you. You briefly scanned the organized room, noticing not much had changed since the last time you had been there.

“To what to I owe the pleasure of your visit today, (F/N)?” Erwin asked, leaning his chin on clasped hands. “I don’t recall sending for you recently.”

“No,” you replied, stepping around the guest chair and towards his desk; _that chair wasn’t here last time_ , you noted. You reached into a pocket on the side of your brown skirt to pull out a heavy, white envelope before tossing it onto the desk in front of him. “This is for you.”

Erwin glanced at the envelope for a moment, eyes lingering on the wax seal, before opening it and pulling out its contents. The only sound in the room was the tapping of your foot while you waited for him to read the included letter, jitters going through your body that could only be attributed to feelings akin to anxiety and regret; was this really worth it?

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding when Erwin’s eyes finally left the paper to search your own instead.

“Unconditional support from a noble – this noble in particular – sounds like a ruse,” Erwin suggested. “What’s the catch?” he asked, his eyes not leaving yours. You quirked your head to the side and gave Erwin one of your most charming smiles.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you said, taking a seat in the chair beside you. You tried to force the jitters down; it wouldn’t do to let Erwin know you were having second thoughts about this. “The kind lord simply wants to assist me in furthering my heroic hopes and dreams in gratitude for all I’ve done for him and his family. Didn’t the letter mention something like that?” You lounged back into the chair, crossing one leg over the other.

Erwin didn’t speak; his sharp eyes scanned your face, searching for something. You casually leaned your cheek against the palm of your hand. “All he wants in return is my own happiness. Of course, since he’s so dedicated, I’m sure he’ll send by some of his contacts to check in on me and make sure I’m being given the treatment he expects,” you said, still smiling. Erwin still didn’t speak; you knew he was sharp enough not to take that as a threat, but to read deeper instead. After what felt like an hour of being silently scrutinized – but was probably closer to thirty seconds – the man nodded, seemingly satisfied.

“Alright,” he said, pulling out a blank sheet of paper and a pen. For a moment you felt as though your heart had stopped; even with all the resolve you could muster, it seemed a part of you was still hoping he would turn down the lord’s offer. He scratched down a quick note on the paper before folding it and sliding it across the desk to you. “Take this to Hange. She’ll assign you living quarters and oversee your training. Welcome to the Survey Corps, (F/N).” You tried not to shudder as he uttered the same words that had likely been the equivalent of a death sentence to countless individuals before you – except even those individuals had undergone extensive training first. You shook your hands as if you were slinging off droplets of water, hoping instead to fling off the cold, clammy feeling washing over you.

“Thank you, Erwin,” you said, standing. You made an effort to keep your smile just as charming as it had been before. “Though I suppose I should refer to you as Commander now.”

After bidding Erwin a temporary farewell, you allowed your smile to drop while traveling along the familiar hallways of the Survey Corps HQ until you were in front of Hange’s office door. Rubbing a hand over your face, you tried to force away the doubt that was still creeping through your veins. _Stick with your damn decisions, (F/N)_ , you thought. After slapping the sides of your face, you knocked twice.

“Come in!”

Without announcing yourself further, you simply opened the door, stepped inside, and then closed it again, waiting for the brunette to notice you. You leaned to the side to get a better look at what she was staring at on her desk. Raising an eyebrow, you watched her stick her face uncomfortably close to a test tube containing something most people would probably rather not identify. After scribbling something down onto a scrap of paper beside the tube, she finally turned around and froze for a moment before smiling and bolting up from her chair.

“(F/N)!” she yelled, almost vaulting over her chair to crush you into a hug. As much as you missed the ability to breathe, you had to admit that normal feeling seemed to be returning to your body in the presence of Hange Zoe, one of the few people you allowed yourself to be open with. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad? “What are you doing here? Erwin didn’t tell me he was hiring you for another job!”

“H-Hange,” you gasped out, gently patting her back. “Can’t breathe…”

“Oops,” she said, letting go. “Really, what are you doing here, though?”

You gave her a small smile and handed her the paper with Erwin’s note. “This is from Erwin.”

Hange took the note and read it, her excited expression dropping into one of confusion. “You haven’t had any training at all?” she asked. You shook your head. “And you… want to join the Survey Corps?” She narrowed her eyes at you. You knew it would be harder to convince Hange to accept this than it had been to convince Erwin. Even soldiers who had gone through intense training to be able to fight Titans still didn’t want to join the faction with the highest death count, and you had never mentioned a desire to join to Hange in the past.

“I’ve been interested in the Survey Corps since I was 11,” you explained. “It’s always been a goal of mine to join and do my part in helping save humanity. I just never had the chance before now due to my upbringing and other circumstances.” You didn’t bother to hide the monotony in your voice; Hange would have been able to tell you’d rehearsed that even if you tried to fake it.

Hange furrowed her brow, attempting to analyze your little speech. “Look, (F/N), I don’t know what this is about, but…” she trailed off. “If you’re sure, and even Erwin gave it the okay, I guess there isn’t much I can say against it.” After another moment of silence, a grin took over her face again. “We can talk about my new hypothesis I thought of about the Titans a couple of days ago! I can even request for you to be on my squad! Not that Erwin has approved to have us capture a Titan alive yet, but I swear I’ll convince him soon!” A gentle smile crossed your face as Hange began to excitedly ramble about her plans to convince the Commander of the benefits of capturing a live Titan – not that you hadn’t heard it before.

“Hange, I hate to interrupt,” you said, “but I do need to go get my trunk of things and get settled in. Can we get that done and then talk more after dinner, maybe?”

Hange agreed, and so began your first day as a member of the Survey Corps. Hange showed you to the female, cadet-rank dormitory and helped you get your things organized before giving you a rundown of your schedule; this included meal times and training times, though you wouldn’t be allowed to train with the other cadets until you were at least up to speed on the basics that were typically covered during the three years of training almost everyone else had to go through. She gave you one of her uniforms to borrow until she could get a couple sent in for you in your size; your cheeks flushed when you had to ask her for help with getting into the pants and buckles.

Private training began with Hange the next day, but things didn’t go quite as planned. Instead of becoming acquainted with the feeling of flying, you became _well_ acquainted with the taste of dirt. Hange had you perform various exercises in an attempt to increase your leg and core strength, but nothing seemed to be working fast enough to gain apparent results. After about a week of trying out your luck with aptitude on the 3-Dimensional Maneuver Gear, Hange was forced to report to Erwin that you hadn’t been able to stay upright for long enough to advance to the next level of training.

In your spare time, you found yourself lounging on the couch in Hange’s office more than spending time in your assigned room – you knew you’d have to become friendly with your roommates at some point, but you didn’t quite feel in the mood for charming them when all that was on your mind was your complete failure with this job before it had even really had a chance to begin. _I’ve never failed a job before_ , you reminded yourself daily. _I can do this._

On the evening after Hange had reported to Erwin about your lack of aptitude, you were writing in your journal when Hange came storming into the office. You looked up, waiting for her to speak, but she just kept staring at you with a slight scowl on her face – she looked as though some elaborate plot of hers had been thwarted. “If you keep that expression up for much longer, your face might freeze that way and you’d be forced to look like Levi for eternity,” you joked dryly. Hange snorted before letting out a long sigh and relaxing into her desk chair.

“Well, I hope you like Levi’s face, because he’s going to be stealing you from me for a while.”

You blinked twice. “What?”

“You know I had to tell Erwin that you weren’t doing so well with training,” Hange explained with a grimace. “Of course, rather than being sensible and saying that you shouldn’t keep a position in the military if you can’t stay upright – not that I don’t love having you around, (F/N), I’m just concerned - he’s decided that you might, uh, learn better if Levi trains you instead.”

“Why the hell would Levi be any better at it than you?” you spat. It’s not like you had anything against the man; he just wasn’t someone you could be yourself around, which would make you even tenser than you already were. Though you did have to admit that you had suspicions about Hange not training you quite as thoroughly as she should; something about her behavior had felt a bit off.

“Erwin’s reasoning was that, since Levi didn’t learn from conventional training methods like the rest of us, he might have some kind of different tricks to figuring it out,” Hange explained. “I guess the idea has some merit to it, but, (F/N)…” Hange trailed off, leaning closer in your direction. “Are you really sure you want to do this?”

There it was again, the question that plagues you in your own mind and from Hange each day for the past week. “Yes,” you responded without hesitating. _No._ But you have to do it. You can’t back out when your one goal is on the line. What’s the worst that can happen? Becoming Titan food. Maybe you should try a bit harder. “It’s fine. Maybe Levi will be helpful.” _Maybe Levi won’t have any qualms about training me since he doesn’t care for me in particular. Or maybe he’ll decide I’m un-trainable and convince Erwin to kick me out. Or maybe he will just kill me instead. It’s fine._

You groaned and pressed your face into your hands. If you say it’s okay enough times, maybe it will become true?

“On a different note, how are you getting along with your roommates?” Hange asked with a nervous chuckle, changing the subject. You slowly lifted your head from your hands.

“I’ve been avoiding them, if you hadn’t noticed,” you said, indicating towards your spot on the sofa with your hands. “I’d at least like to be labeled as something other than a failure before I attempt to bond with anyone, really.”

“Aw, and here I thought you just loved spending time with me that much,” Hange whined before letting out a soft hum. “Maybe you could ask them for tips.”

“I’d rather not draw attention to the fact that a noble bought me a position here without even sending me through a day of training first,” you drawled, lying down. You flung an arm over your eyes. “Everyone’s going to think I’m some spoiled, Sina brat.”

“Hmm, I suppose that _is_ what it sounds like if you were to look at the situation as an outsider,” Hange murmured thoughtfully.

“Not helping.”

“Sorry, sorry,” she chuckled. “But really, they’re all super nice. Stop hiding in my office and go make some more friends!”

“Don’t wanna,” you muttered, rolling on your side so that you were facing the back of the couch. “I already made a new friend. This couch is my friend. You and the couch are plenty.”

“Maybe you’ll become friends with Levi,” Hange said, laughing at your antics. “You both like tea.”

“Somehow that doesn’t seem likely,” you replied. “I’ve encountered him on and off for five years and we’ve never even exchanged more than stupid small talk, if it can even be considered that. I’m sure he’ll just run me into the ground. Maybe,” you sighed again, “just maybe, it will magically work and I’ll be able to remove dirt and grass from my diet.” Hange laughed once more.

“Let’s hope so,” she said. “Just meet him tomorrow morning, same time and place as normal. And good luck; shorty’s got quite the temper.”

So here you are, attempting to learn from Captain Levi; too bad all you’d done so far was spend half of the day eating more dirt.

“Which idiot in Sina thought it would be a good idea to send such an inept brat to join the military?” Levi asks as you push yourself up off of the ground. You spit out some grass that got shoved into your mouth before wiping away a large chunk of dirt on your chin.

“That’s classified information,” you mutter as you brush the dirt off of your uniform – though you begin to doubt that this uniform will be salvageable with all of the dirt and grass stains encrusted in it over the past week. You yank on the buckles and sides of the pants a little, still unable to adjust to the tightness around your legs.

“Tch. Disgusting.”

You rub your forehead as you meet his eyes, taking a deep breath. “Maybe, sir, I could improve if you would inform me of what I’m doing wrong,” you suggest with a smile. Your back is tense and you would give anything to go lie in your plush, warm bed back inside Wall Rose, but you cover your negativity with a quirk of your head and the smile that’s charmed hundreds of people to spill their deepest secrets to you without a second thought.

However, Levi’s scowl remains unaffected by your methods as he steps forward, pulling your face in front of his with the collar of your shirt. It’s not like you haven’t been around Levi before, but you’d never seen his steely glare quite so close-up until that moment. Your pulse speeds up. “What is it those bastards say during training? Something about how soldiers who can’t even stay upright aren’t worthy of being so much as a decoy?” His eyes scan down your body before trailing back up to your face, taking some sort of silent assessment. “Unhook yourself and run twenty laps around the compound,” he orders, releasing you and stepping back.

You don’t move, just standing there and blinking at him for longer than you should have. He quirks an eyebrow and stares at you expectantly. “That was an order.”

You let out a sharp exhale through your nose before your usual smile returns to your face. “Yes, sir.”

As you reach the halfway point in your laps, you begin to realize that – while you weren’t particularly out of shape – your body isn’t in the condition it needed to be for you to survive in a military environment. Hange’d had you running laps as well, but not quite so many as once; you assumed she was trying to slowly ease you into running more. _Or maybe she was just lovingly trying to get me kicked_ out, you consider. You slow to a stop and look up at the sky before covering your face with your hands. “Is this really worth it?” you mutter before shaking your head and bending down to adjust the pants and straps again; how the hell do people stand wearing these?

“Keep running, brat!” you hear Levi yell. You jump back into an upright position before you start running again, albeit a bit slower than you had been before.

After what felt like ages of running, you finally finish your last lap and slow to a stop in front of Levi, leaning over and breathing heavily. Sweat drips down the side of your face, but you’re too exhausted to wipe it away.

“Oi,” he says. You look up just in time to see him toss a canteen – probably water – in your direction. You catch it smoothly. “Drink it. I don’t plan on dealing with you passing out if you get dehydrated.”

You do as he says a drink the water before tossing the canteen back to him.

“Hook back up. You’re trying again.”

“Right now?” you ask, exasperated, as your legs tremble.

“Do it,” he orders, clearly unamused. You force yourself not to respond and trudge up to the device that had been tormenting you for a week. You hook yourself in and anxiously wait for Levi to turn the crank that would lift up the wires.

 _This is ridiculous_ , you think, tightening your core muscles as your feet lift off the ground. _If I can’t do it when I feel my best, how would I be able to do it when my legs feel boneless?_ But for once, you aren’t immediately tipping forward; maybe Levi’s hellish laps worked some kind of magic? For a brief moment, you entertain the idea that, this time, you’ll manage to stay upright – but then your body goes backwards. Your vision shoots to black for a moment as the back of your head hits the ground.

“Shit,” you mutter, trying to reach around to the back of your head. All of a sudden, your whole body flops to the ground; Levi must have unhooked your belt from the device.

“Pathetic,” he scoffs. You bristle, shifting your body position on the ground; what does he expect after having you run twenty laps? “Is your gear broken?”

“Hange checked it a couple of days ago and even had me use someone else’s gear,” you explain, sitting up. You shake your head in an attempt to regain your sense of balance, feeling dazed. “Unless everyone’s gear is broken, that’s probably not the issue. Sir.”

“Oh?” Levi says, squatting down in front of you. “Then I guess you’ll just have to run another twenty laps. If there’s any dinner left by the time you’re done, feel free to eat.”

Your mouth hangs open stupidly before you snap it shut and smile at him and his damned bored expression. “Yes, sir.” He watches you scrutinizingly as you stand, rub the back of your head, and start off at a jog in the same direction you had before.

“Faster, brat!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There it is! Thank you for reading, and hopefully a second chapter will be out in a reasonable amount of time! I will do my best, but life does sometimes get in the way. Let me know what you think!
> 
> Next time: Reader-chan attempts some of Hange's people advice before she experiences some strange training techniques, courtesy of Captain Levi.


	2. Your Balance Fucking Sucks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello again! Thank you guys for the feedback on the first chapter! I now present to you Chapter Two! I know that a lot of people, when they write Levi/Reader stuff, make an MC who is (for example) a squad leader or talented cadet, but one of the things I really wanted to play with here is how it would be to enlist in this military if you are actually not cut out for it - since I know I would probably NOT be cut out for it, myself. Fun times. I hope to keep Reader-chan relateable and interesting. 
> 
> And sorry this took longer than I planned; my work schedule got changed around, so I got all messed up Q_Q
> 
> Also, the new Linked Horizon album is amazing and everyone should buy it and listen to it. Highly recommend. 10/10
> 
> Disclaimer: All I own here is my plot~

Your stomach lets out an embarrassing growl as you sit on your cot in the barracks, jotting down notes about your day into your journal. Unfortunately, you hadn’t finished your laps fast enough for any food – or people, for that matter – to be left in the cafeteria. You had considered trying to make something yourself, but you weren’t sure if cadets had permission to use the kitchen freely and didn’t want to get off on the wrong foot with anyone you hadn’t met yet. Keeping your reputation as spotless as Levi’s cravat was essential for what you needed to achieve.

“Your name is (F/N), right?”

You stop writing and look up; it’s not like you had forgotten that there were other people in the room, but you had genuinely hoped they wouldn’t feel the need to interact with you. Nonetheless, you set down your journal and smile.

“That’s right,” you say, analyzing the brunette in front of you. Her hair is up in a ponytail and her face is painted with a kind smile. “What’s your name?”

“Lynne,” she says, holding out her hand. You lean forward to give her a firm handshake. “I heard that you, uh, didn’t have to go through training. Did you learn how to use the gear on your own, like how Captain Levi did?”

It takes every ounce of strength in your body not to grimace at the fact that she had not only asked the dreaded question you’d been hoping not to deal with, but she even gave an unintentional jab at the small, angry cause of your throbbing legs. _At least I don’t have to wear those damn pants when I sleep,_ you think. “I’ve actually wanted to join the Survey Corps since I was eleven,” you explain gently, giving the back of your neck a scratch in an effort to appear sheepish. “I grew up as a servant within Wall Sina, so I didn’t really have an opportunity to enlist, you know? I finally had the chance this year, but there was a problem with something in my paperwork and they refused my application.” The woman, Lynne, nods, hanging off your words. “I got lucky though. One of the nobles is a close friend of my family, and he managed to pull some strings so that I could have a position here.”

“Oh, wow,” Lynne breathes out. “Wait, so you haven’t had any training, then?” she asks, her bright eyes widening.

“Not with gear, but I have been taught how to horseback ride, and I know a fair amount of hand-to-hand combat techniques,” you say, pushing a stray strand of hair behind your ear. Then you curl your legs up to your chest, wrapping your arms around your knees. “The Commander has Captain Levi training me, actually, so it’s funny that you mentioned him.”

“Well that explains why you haven’t been showing up at dinner,” Lynne muses.

“Right… about that,” you start, deciding to turn this conversation in your favor. “Is it generally frowned upon for cadets to use the kitchen freely?” Your question is punctuated by another growl from your stomach.

Lynne lets out a hearty laugh, her eyes scrunching closed. “Yeah, you’d definitely get in trouble if you got caught at this time of day,” she explains. “Though how much trouble would depend on who catches you. The Captain’s punishments are usually the worst, though some people say Squad Leader Hange is the scariest if you actually get her mad.”

“Oi, go to sleep already,” someone groans from another one of the cots. You and Lynne both glance in her direction before chuckling lightly.

“I suppose we should let everyone sleep. It was nice talking to you, (F/N),” Lynne says, blowing out her candle and sinking under the covers on her cot.

“Good night, Lynne,” you say politely.

“G’night, (F/N)!”

You reach over to pick up your journal and finish logging what you’d learned that day. ‘ _Note: apparently Levi gives the worst punishments’_ you write in the margin of the page. Once you hear the other inhabitants in the room all breathing evenly, you allow yourself to slouch back towards the wall and let out a sigh. You give your cheeks a quick massage; between Levi and the other cadets, this job is quickly beginning to make you regret the methods you’d been using for work for the past six years.

With a final long sigh, you blow out your candle and go to sleep.

*******

You take a deep breath, feeling whatever shreds of motivation you have left slip out of your body like sap from a tree. For what feels like the thousandth time – but is really only the second time today – your body lifts into the air before you wobble and eventually tip over. This time, however, gravity isn’t allowed to finish its job; instead, you feel your body sustained in the air from a strong grip on the back of your shirt.

“Are you even fucking trying?” Levi snaps, clearly annoyed. You force yourself to take a long breath in and out before responding; all the patience and self-control you’d cultivated over your life apparently began to slip away from you when your body was in extreme states of discomfort.

“I’m trying my best, sir,” you say. The grip on the back of your shirt disappears and you fall the rest of the way forward, your face again ramming into the soft dirt. _At least with Hange I could complain_ , you think as you stand back up after the stupid machine gets lowered. Luckily, since your fall was stopped mid-way, you’d actually managed to avoid getting dirt into your mouth for once. You brush a piece of grass from your cheek as you notice Levi glaring at you.

“Then your best is shit,” he says, crossing his arms. “20 laps.”

“Yes, sir,” you respond with a smile. Your smile drops as soon as you’re facing away from him; you’re seriously not looking forward to falling back into the same pattern as the day before. Your legs still haven’t recovered from all the running, and it was clear they wouldn’t be given time to rest within the near future. So far, the only differences between Hange’s training and Levi’s was the fact that he made you do about triple of what Hange’d had you doing – but he had yet to actually try anything _different_.

_Maybe the real reason Erwin assigned Levi to me instead was because he suspected Hange of plotting something, too_ , you consider.

Your day continues similarly to the day before: try to stay upright with the stupid aptitude machine, fail, run laps. Every now and then, Levi has you supplement your laps with sit-ups or other ab exercises before you try to stay upright again. For the sixth time, you hook yourself into the machine, lightly pressing your sore torso with the tips of your fingers. You’re really not cut out for this military stuff.

Dirt again. You sigh. _I think I’ve sighed more in the past week than in the rest of my life combined,_ you think. You wait for your body to hit the ground and then patiently expect Levi to throw out another degrading comment about how pitiful you are – as if you didn’t figure that out on your own. But when he doesn’t say anything, you look up, brushing the dirt from your face. It’s a miracle you haven’t broken out in acne yet from all the dirt that has to be shoved up in your pores – or broken your nose, for that matter.

Levi is just standing there watching you, his face fixed in its usual bored expression. His eyes trail down from your face to your body – _he’s probably staring at this disgusting uniform_ – before he sneers as though he’s imagining the dirt on your clothes flying over and attaching to his clothes instead.

“Get lunch, clean the shit off your uniform, and come to my office,” Levi orders suddenly before turning and walking back to headquarters. You sit there, immobile for a moment still, until you scramble to your feet and head to the mess hall.

*******

You stand in front of Levi’s door, your hands beginning to sweat from nerves. You’d visited many rooms in the Survey Corps HQ over the past few years, but you’d always found reasons to avoid this one. Unfortunately, orders were orders and you don’t really want to know what Levi would make you do if you just _never showed up_ to his office after he told you to.

You slowly raise your hand and knock lightly on the door.

“Name and business?”

“It’s (F/N). Or Cadet (L/N),” you say, unsure which way you are expected to address yourself now.

“Come in,” Levi says, and you open the door.

As soon as you step in, you scan your surroundings – _one couch, desk facing the door like Erwin’s, door on the right, less bookshelves than Hange, not a grain of dirt anywhere_ – before your eyes land on Levi; he’s sitting at his desk working on what you assume to be a large stack of paperwork. He looks up from his paperwork and stares at you for a moment.

“Didn’t I tell you to get the shit off of your uniform?” he asks dryly.

Your cheek twitches in annoyance as you look down at your uniform – really Hange’s uniform, since yours hadn’t come in yet. “It’s just stained, sir,” you explain, absently pulling at the straps on your thighs. “I don’t currently have the materials to remove the stains, so I haven’t been able to clean it as thoroughly as I would like since it would just make the stains set into the fabric. There’s nothing _on_ it, so there won’t be any dirt falling onto your floor. Sir.”

Levi blatantly stares at a particularly large grass stain on your left arm, though you notice a brief hint of surprise in his eyes; he must not have expected you to know anything about proper stain removal.

“You’re cleaning that shelf. I’ll be checking it after you’re done. If I find a single speck of dust, you’re doing the whole thing again.”

_This is ridiculous. I guess he decided I’m so hopeless that he’ll just use me as a maid instead of properly training me._ _Not like training was doing me any good,_ you think, your overworked muscles throbbing. You grab a cleaning cloth from the bucket you see on the floor and make your way up the ladder, cringing in pain. _Stupid training. Stupid midget. Stupid job. At least cleaning is therapeutic and I don’t have to talk to him._ You angle the cloth just right to get the dust around some of the books without getting the actual books wet. _Why is it even dusty up here? Is he too short to clean it himself?_ you think. _Or maybe he specifically leaves it dirty to make people clean it as a punishment._ You reach down with one hand to yank on the harnesses on your thighs, trying to relieve the feeling of them cutting into your skin through the pants. _I hate these pants. I hate these belts. I hate-_

Your thoughts are interrupted as the whole ladder suddenly shakes, causing you to lose your balance and start to fall. Your heart feels like it’s about to pound right out of your chest, but you manage to grab hold of the side of the ladder and slide the rest of the way down – thankfully avoiding landing on your ass. You press a hand to your chest once your feet are firmly planted on the floor before you notice Levi’s foot on the bottom of the ladder. You try to keep your eye from twitching in annoyance.

_Deep breaths, (F/N),_ you think. _Don’t make a scene. Do not make a scene. Do not_\- your mantra is interrupted by the condescending look on Levi’s face as he quirks an eyebrow and eyes the hand you still have on the side of the ladder. _Fuck it._

 “What the hell?” you snap, finally losing control over your pleasant façade. You glare at Levi, though it doesn’t seem to affect him in the slightest – and he doesn’t seem surprised at your sudden lack of propriety, either.

“Testing your balance,” he says. “It fucking sucks. It’s a good thing your reflexes aren’t as bad, or you might’ve turned into a shit stain on my floor.” You stare at him, your mouth dropping open.

_What the fuck?_ you think. _Knocking me off a ladder was a test?_ You snap your mouth shut as you realize that, ridiculous testing methods or not, he actually _had_ tried harder in two days to train you than Hange did in an entire week – and just when you were really starting to lose your motivation, goals or no goals. _So much for being a maid._  You take a deep breath and close your eyes, forcing your face into a relaxed expression. Your heart rate slows back down to normal, and you begin to regain control over yourself.

“Why are you taking this so seriously?” you ask, successfully keeping any venom from seeping into your voice.

“What?” Levi asks, eyes narrowing. He takes a step towards you; you deliberately take a step back. There’s something dangerous in his eyes that wasn’t there before, but your desire for answers is stronger than your desire to not test the limits of his temper.

“Why are you taking training me so seriously? Hange didn’t work me this hard; it’s not like it matters that much anyway,” you explain, your voice getting quieter with each word that comes out of your mouth – you don’t miss his expression slowly darkening with each word you speak. _Shit, shit, shit, I forgot military respect terms._

Before you have a chance to tack on a ‘sir’ to the end of your statement, Levi storms the rest of the way forward and slams his hands on the wall behind you, trapping you. “Do you have a fucking death wish?” he growls.

You don’t respond; you aren’t sure what you were expecting, but it wasn’t that. It isn’t like you really plan on fighting any Titans. If everything goes smoothly, you’ll get your job done and leave without spending too much time as a soldier. But you hadn’t realized that giving up on ever mastering 3D Maneuver Gear would piss off the Captain so much – than again, Hange did warn you he had a temper.

“I don’t know why the hell you’re really here, but Erwin has to have a damn good reason to accept a useless brat like you into our ranks. If it doesn’t have to do with Titans, that’s your problem. You’re in the fucking Survey Corps. This isn’t a game. The reality is that you _will_ die if you do not learn how to use this gear. So get a fucking grip, moron, and actually put in an effort,” Levi explains, his voice low but sharp.

You scan his face, taking in what he said, and the realization that he is right washes over you like a cold bucket of water being poured over your head. There’s no telling how long it will take for you to get the information you need; there’s no telling if your plans will go as smoothly as you’d like. It’s not like you’ve always been able to foresee the outcomes of your jobs. _Dammit, I thought I was over this,_ you think as your chest squeezes with guilt. You have a hard time meeting his gaze; underneath his anger, if you look hard enough, you can see the pain of losing people – from friends to fellow soldiers.

_I’m sorry for what I did,_ you apologize to him in your mind for the hundredth time.

‘Levi hates needless deaths,’ Hange had told you once. You realize then that, while Hange’s protectiveness of you was much more personal, neither officers want you dead – they just had very different methods of ensuring your safety. In this case, Levi’s method better fits your goals; you can’t finish your job if you get kicked out of the Survey Corps within two weeks of joining. You also can’t finish your job if you’re sent on an expedition and get eaten by a Titan.

“Yes, sir,” you say, a resolve in your voice that wasn’t there before. After a pause, Levi backs up, seemingly satisfied with your response.

“Get back to cleaning,” he says before sitting down at his desk, going back to his paperwork. You grab the cloth you’d been using and climb back up the ladder. “Shitty glasses was hoping Erwin would kick you out when she pointed out how useless you were after a week with her. Erwin must have a fucking good reason for keeping you here since he has me wasting all my time training you instead of listening to her.”

You take in his words, trying to figure out why he even bothered to tell you that. _Was that a roundabout way of telling me Erwin has faith in me, or is he just trying to make me feel like shit?_ you wonder.

“Thank you, sir,” you say, your voice light in an attempt to be polite as you wipe the last bit of dust off of the shelf in front of you.

“Stop throwing around the shitty pleasantries,” he says, almost making you fall off the ladder again in surprise. “You think I can’t tell it’s an act?”

After freezing for a moment, you climb down a level to work on the next shelf. Your furrow your brow; it’s not your fault that you lost control of yourself around him a couple of times. _Why couldn’t he just not mention it?_

“To be fair, sir, most people either can’t tell or make a conscious effort to pretend they think the way I behave is genuine,” you explain, unsure how to deal with the situation. You suppose this is a sign that you need to work on containing your negative emotions under unexpected forms of duress. You let out a sigh; how are you supposed to behave around him now? _For all I know, Hange gossips about me when I’m not here,_ you think, considering blaming her for Levi’s insight.

“Tch. Most people are idiots.”

*******

An hour or so later, Levi checked after your cleaning and found himself surprisingly satisfied – clearly he was expecting to make you re-clean his shelves at least once, but they were actually well done. _Serves him right,_ you think, smug. Your stomach grumbles and, thankfully, Levi allows you to go to dinner instead of finding some new method of torture for you.

After quickly shoving some food down your throat, you decided to again spend an evening in Hange’s office; _surely one night of socializing with a roommate will be enough to satisfy her_ , you think. After all, you have a couple of bones to pick with her. You have your face pressed into the throw pillow on the couch and don’t bother looking up when you hear the door open.

“Oh, (F/N), you’re here again today?” Hange asks, closing the door behind her. You grunt in response, your legs and torso still aching from the past two days with Levi. “How’s training gone today and yesterday? Shorty have any more luck with you than I did?”

You finally gain the energy to move and look at Hange, who just sat down backwards in her desk chair to stare at you. “I think he’s trying to kill me,” you tell her before narrowing your eyes. “But at least he isn’t trying to get me kicked out.”

Hange’s eyes widen for a moment before returning to normal. “Ahahaha,” she laughs awkwardly, “why would he try to get you kicked out?”

“I don’t know why _he_ would try to get me kicked out,” you start, “but I do have my guesses as to why _someone else_ might slack off on purpose in hopes that Erwin would go back on his deal if I sucked badly enough.”

“Levi told you, didn’t he?”

“He did,” you respond, “but I already assumed that was what you were doing since a few days ago.”

It’s rare for Hange to get serious, but when something is important to her it’s easy to see her usual, joker tendencies slip away – which you see happening right in front of you as her eyes harden. “It’s hard for me not to worry when all I can assume is that some Sina asshole bullied you into this without realizing you would probably die before learning whatever it is they want you to learn.”

“I get it, Hange,” you say gently. “If I knew you were putting yourself in a life-threatening position and didn’t understand why, I would probably do anything I could to get you out of the situation too. But for this, I just need you to trust me. I can promise you that I’m here by my own will, at least. Or I guess if that’s not enough, at the very least, you can take a page out of Levi’s book and trust Erwin; hell, he seems to have more faith in me than I do right now,” you explain, remembering Levi’s words.

Hange stares at you silently before closing her eyes. “Fine,” she says, her body relaxing. “I’ll trust you. And Erwin. He’s got to have something up his sleeve since he blatantly refused all of my attempts to convince him to kick you to the curb.” Her eyes open again and she fixes you with a determined stare. “But listen, (F/N), if you’re really going to do this, you’ve really gotta take training-“

“Take training seriously, yeah I know,” you interrupt, pulling your journal out of the bag you brought with you. You have a lot to write about today. “Levi already lectured me on how I’ll die if I don’t ‘get a fucking grip, moron.’”

Hange lets out a sharp laugh, the tension in the room dissipating as you fall back into your normal comfort zone with the woman. “See, I told you you’d be great friends,” she says through her laughter.

You look up from the page you had just written the date on in your journal, giving Hange a blank stare. “There is literally nothing I told you that would indicate that we’re friends. Honestly, he made things even harder for me today when he told me to – how did he put it – ‘stop with the shitty pleasantries’ or something like that.” You narrow your eyes, remembering your speculation that Hange had gossiped about you to him. “What all have you told him about me?”

“Ehh?” she asks through her continuing laughter. “I haven’t told him anything. Did he say I did?”

You shake your head. “No, but people don’t usually notice the full extent of how fake I am with them, so I thought you might have let your mouth run.” You fix her with a hard stare. “And if you let your mouth run, I worry about what else you might tell him about me and my past.”

Hange’s laughs subside; she knows when you’re being serious just as easily as you can tell with her. “I wouldn’t tell him about _that_. If anyone talks to him about it, it would need to be you.” Then a slow smile creeps onto her face. “But wow, we sure are talking about Levi a lot. Has he made that much of an impression on you?”

You scowl, going back to writing in your journal. “I’m with him for most of the day at this point; what else am I supposed to talk about?”

“Where were you last night?”

You don’t even need to look up to know she’s smirking. ‘ _Note: Hange’s a pervert’_ you write in the margin of your journal. “Get your mind out of the gutter, Hange. I was in the barracks. I even talked to one of my roommates.”

“And how was that?”

“Fucking exhausting.”

“Hmm, sounds like Levi’s rubbing off on you.”

“My shoe’s going to be rubbing off on you if you don’t shut up.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! Hope to see you all again~
> 
> Next time: look forward to some physical contact with everyone's favorite shorty :3


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